A Pioneer Story: By an 8-Year-Old Me

Recently, (and I hope to your great delight) I read a few of my very oldest stories to my siblings. I say stories because in an hour or less, there was time for a great many of them. A full story was about 800 words (usually fewer)---half of what I write on a good day now. A year ago, when I shared my very first story, unedited with comments from yours truly, I received some pretty interested readers.

Hopefully this story will be just as funny! And remember, no matter how sarcastic I get about my old work, I do still think it's important. You can read my thoughts on appreciating your old work here.

First a little bit of background on the story. As you guessed from the title, I was eight years old when I wrote it. And a young eight, at that. I wrote it by hand first, and typed it later. Somewhere along the way, I didn't transfer a "happy ending" chapter. I can see the scribbly writing on the page in my head---the end goal of the story is met---why I didn't type it up, I have no idea.

It might also be helpful to know that The Little House on the Prairie books were the books in my life at this time. I certainly felt a lot of those vibes in my story when I re-read this the other night.

Well, let's begin!

*Note: Beware! This story is unedited. Grammar Nazis are probably going to be offended.

Chapter 1

"I wish papa was here," wished Eliza. Eliza stood in the small kitchen helping her mother dry dishes. Elizabeth Belling and her mother and brother were part of wagon train. Her father had been killed by an Indian a year earlier.

Eliza's mother whose name was exactly Eliza's name was helping make food and do dishes for the wagon train.

"Now Nathan, "who was Eliza's brother," and Eliza you know very well that I am going to try to remarry," exclaimed Mother who was tired of reminding them that.

"I just miss hunting with him," sighed Nathan.

"Well I just miss reading with him," Eliza said.

"I miss everything," giggled mother.

First comment: I don't know what I was thinking, but I'm pretty sure if I lost a loved one, I would miss them more than a hobby I happened to do with them. I'm also a huge fan of how Mrs. Belling is trying to remarry so quickly---not because she cares about anybody and not because her late husband would want her to be happy. 😬 Just because she wants to get married again---probably mostly because her kids won't shut up about missing their father (which is not at all the same as wanting a new one!)

Then suddenly a man shouted," Help, Help!" A wolf is attacking my sheep!"

Boom! Boom! Boom! A minute later the whole pack was dead.

"Thank you," the man gasped.

"At least nobody got hurt," Mother said.

Then she looked at her watch," goodness time to go to bed," she exclaimed. Hurrying in to their pajamas they hopped into bed and instantly fell asleep.

Little House vibes. Nice. Random man. One wolf attacking some sheep and suddenly the whole pack is dead. I guess I wanted to put in a more obvious flare of The Little House on the Prairie. I'm also desperately curious to know who killed the wolves. What was my mind thinking nine years ago? I guess I'll never know. :/

Chapter 2

"That was some excitement last night," Nathan stated. Eliza giggled but her Mother did not.

"There are too many dangers out here. I have decided to go back to our town, she gravely said.

"But-" Eliza began.

"I was not done; we will pack today and leave tomorrow."

"How will you managed Elizabeth? It is one hundred miles away," said Aunt Ella.

"We will manage Nathan is fourteen. He is old enough to drive. I have my plans. We will go back the way we came so we will not get lost," she explained.

Have it your way," Uncle Tom muttered under his breath.

Ooh, my first flare of character, found in ambiguous Uncle Tom. I can almost hear him saying something about "stubborn woman---gets it from our father," or something like that. That must be congratulated before I sink my teeth deeper into the story and tear it apart. Eliza Belling the First? Deciding that traveling one hundred miles back to town by themselves was safer than traveling with the wagon train? Interesting.

"May we be excused?" Eliza asked.

"Yes and start packing anything lying around," said Mother.

"Yes ma'am Eliza politely answered. She found her jump rope, doll and hula hoop.

Nathan found his science book and experiments; he wanted to be scientist you see. There was packing to be done and chores and dishes. At the end of the day everybody on the wagon train had helped the Bellings.

So Nathan wants to be a scientist? Is this a first hint of motivation for one of my characters? Sadly, no. It's possible, I suppose that he wanted to be one, but a boy his age, who has no father, wouldn't be concerned with becoming something as abstract as a scientist when his family needed his support. Of course, at eight years old, the phrase, "Money doesn't grow on trees," didn't mean as much as it does now.

Chapter 3

"Wake up, wake up sis," sang out Nathan loudly.

"All right up," replied Eliza. Buttoning up her dress she did not find her mother. Running outside she still did not find her mother. At the top of a hill she found her mother sobbing.

"I came out here to see the birds, and I dropped my wedding ring!" Eliza spun around twice and she saw the ring.

"Here it is," she said.

Her mother looked her sternly in the eyes. "If you are joking, this is not funny."

"I did, see?" Eliza held out the ring.

"I guess you're right," said her mother. "We had better get going."

"Yes," Eliza agreed.

"Let's not tell anyone about this," Mother said.

"Time to go!" Nathan yelled.

"I won't tell," Eliza promised.

"Ready!" said Eliza and her mother.

This is even more random than the wolf episode, and it clashes badly with the fact that the wife of the late Mr. Belling wants to get a new husband. I do like my dialogue tags, though. I saw this in other parts of the story, as well. "Agreed," "promised," "replied," "stated"... they are all nice verbs, and I'm glad to know I was able to use them correctly at this time.

There were hugs and goodbyes and then Nathan shouted, "Giddy-up!"

They were off. They traveled all day, and everything looked the same, except the wagon wheels tracks heading the opposite direction. When they stopped, they made their beds and went to sleep for the night.

The End

Wow, abrupt ending. I know what you're thinking. Did they make it back to town? Yes, they did. I'm not sure why I decided to scrap the first ending that I wrote---not much happened in it---but they reached town at last. I'm pretty sure they also lost their wagon cover during a storm, and their blueberry pie got wet? That's in my head, at any rate, and I think it's pretty cute.

As a babysitter and an employee who works with young children, I always find it sweet to listen to their stories. I wonder if I ever told the stories that frequented my head to my babysitters. The idea makes me smile.

So, despite the hilarious discrepancies that I find in A Pioneer Story, I'm so glad I am able to read it and critique it now. And before I judge it harshly, I try to remember to ask myself what I would think if a different eight-year-old girl told me this story. No doubt I would think it the most adorable thing I'd ever heard.

I hope this story has been amusing, but I also hope it has cemented the fact that you should never disregard or "disown" your oldest works. They're precious parts of your journey. Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think about the story. :D